Sunday Confessions || 6-30-2019

I CONFESS

Vegas was great! And exhausting, ha. The tiki bar was one of my favorite activities... Though there was a slight awkwardness to it... So NONE of the reviews of The Golden Tiki online mentioned the bathroom. Which I'm sure you're like, why would they? WELL. In the guy's bathroom, there are a bunch of animatronic skulls that insult your dick while you pee, and in the gals bathroom, it's full of retro naked wallpaper and dicks.

There is a speaker that has an old school satirical announcers voice going over the "museum" and history of the... artifacts and tells you to ask for a hidden dick tour. I did not.

And apparently until 2ish, there are bathroom attendants that have a whole spread of items you might need and if you tip them you get a jolly rancher. I did not have to use the bathroom until almost three, so I did not get to see what that was all about. Though I know understand why they have one because I used the bathroom once more before we left, and since there was no attendant, there were two girls doing photo ops with the brass dicks. Like, you know, fellating them. It was awkward.

We reserved a booth at the end of the bar, and by 3am (this bar is open 21/7!!!) our waitress came over and said that she needed to move us to another booth because they close the back of the bar after 3am. And you wanna know why? Because there are people that think this is a SWINGERS BAR. WHAT. We looked around the whole back room, and we were the only ones there. What happened to everyone else??? It did sound like maybe they had to ask other people to leave??? We honestly were only paying attention to our own group.

The waitress wouldn't really give us a straight answer if it was or wasn't a swingers bar. We did keep asking before we moved booths, like, wait, is this or is this not a swingers bar?!? What did you do, Heather! Though I looked online the next day, and there is nothing there that lists this bar as one. I SWEAR.

We stayed until fourish, and lots of drinks (and free drinks!) later, we pay our bill (anyone wants to guess how much it was for?) and head for our hotels. Though one friend headed towards the casino to gamble and went to her hotel room after 8 in the morning. Vegas, baby!

The next morning at breakfast, the people that left before this nugget of information had gotten the word and were like, so. Guys. A swingers bar?

Gah.