faerie eye

faerie eye

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Monday, January 15, 2018

Currently Watching | Jean-Claude Van Johnson

I didn't know anything about this going into it, I'm a fairly passive TV watcher; my husband finds things and just puts them on. Every once in awhile I will request to watch something, but since we basically like to watch the same shows, I know that eventually, he will put on the thing I want to watch. Like I said, super passive.

Sometimes, when he puts something new on, and I wasn't paying attention because I'm almost always on my laptop or phone, I won't know if we are watching a movie or a show and I just have to figure it out as it progresses. I mean, I guess I could ask... but I figure I'll know the answer on my own in like five minutes or less, so why bother?

So at first with this show, I thought it was a movie, so I really wasn't paying attention cause I was like oh, action movie: doesn't need my full attention. And I wasn't completely wrong, it's a show about Jean Claude Van Damme making a movie. Kind of. I mean, he is making a movie, but more importantly, he is also a secret agent, which is the main plot. AND IT IS SO RIDICULOUS I LOVE IT. Since he is a spy, he is in various disguises, but still finds so many moments to bring up his alter ego, Jean-Claude Van Damme. And his movies. And how handsome he is. And how charismatic he is. And so on.

I'm not that familiar with Jean-Claude Van Damme, can't say that I've ever watched any of his films, but I feel like it really isn't that necessary to enjoy this. Though maybe the juxtaposition of his movie roles to this would heighten the enjoyment? All I know is that this shit is hilarious and you need to watch it.

Jean-Claude Van Johnson on Amazon Video

(Okay, a lie: I have now seen about 3/4 of one of his movies because they started one after the show. In this movie, they found no less than four occasions for him to be shirtless or just straight up nude... I mean, that ass is glorious so I totally get it. But then there is a scene where they are having a conversation about his penis and how big it is. Like what is this movie. I didn't finish it because I was tired and I figured that the end would be the single mom keeping her farm. And maybe riding that escaped-con dick, 'cause that's what it was leading to, right? THERE IS NO OTHER LOGICAL CONCLUSION TO THIS MOVIE.)